This week we travel to good ol’ Maine in the month of February. A mother, her daughter and the daughter’s doll are at the grocery store. They don’t seem very happy about it, you’d think they were walking to the electric chair. The girl’s doll says it for both of them -- she wants to go home. Everyone in the store stares at them and Mom starts seeing strange things in the frozen food aisle. Then all of the people in the store start hurting themselves and bleeding from their eyes. Fortunately, the butcher is armed with a knife when he sees the doll in a reflection. Or rather unfortunately, he is armed with a knife when he sees the doll in a reflection … and ends up stabbing himself in the face. Clearly this isn’t going to be one of those comic relief bottle episodes.
Scully is enjoying a weekend off, cruising around Maine in a convertible, when Mulder calls to harsh her buzz. This is exactly why I don’t answer my cell phone when coworkers call on my off days. After hanging up, Mustang Scully gets cut off by the mother/daughter duo in the grocery store parking lot. Dana goes inside to try and help. The store manager directs her to the butchered butcher in the back. Scully then calls Mulder. I’ll bet her X-file trumps his. Then she is saddled with the stupidest police officer I think this show has ever had … and that’s saying a lot. Can you imagine being able to identify the mom on camera by name (Melissa Turner), seeing she is unaffected while everyone around her is trying to harm themselves, and thinking it’s not a clue that can possibly explain everything?!? Officer Buddy Riggs definitely isn’t detective of the year. Captain Jack Bonsaint gives Dana a little more of the back story. It turns out Melissa is involved with – was involved with – Dave the butcher. Buddy Boy makes things worse by calling Melissa to tell her about Dave. Melissa’s daughter, Polly, tells Mommy to hang up the phone while the doll dances to the "Hokey Pokey," because, you know, that’s what it’s all about.
Scully and Bonsaint arrive at Melissa’s house, but she's already bolted. Someone also had hammered the windows closed. Was that to keep something out or to keep something in? Dana learns Melissa is a recent widow, Polly is autistic and the butcher ruined his marriage over Melissa. Maybe she cast a spell on him since townsfolk think Melissa's a witch. Polly’s former teacher, Jane Froelich, isn’t fond of the daughter either. She once slapped Polly in the face because she couldn’t control the child. Riggs buys the little girl an ice cream sundae and tries to convince Melissa to let him take care of her. Melissa claims she saw her husband, Rich, dead before he died -- just like Dave. Maybe you should listen to her, Buddy. Meanwhile, Polly and her doll want more cherries, but the cashier won’t give them away for free. The poor woman gets her long hair caught in the ice cream machine while Melissa takes Polly and dolly out of the restaurant.Dana and the captain meet with Froelich, who claims Melissa needs to be burned just like witches from hundreds of years earlier. Melissa and Polly head to Riggs' cabin to hide out. Polly continues to throw a tantrum, which wakes up the doll and results in another of Melissa’s visions. This time, she sees Froelich with a slit throat. Melissa bolts and almost runs over a ranger. The "Hokey Pokey" starts playing in the teacher's house. She threatens someone – something – with a broken record, then proceeds to slash her own throat.
Meanwhile, Scully is back in vacation mode. She’s taking a nice bubble bath and eating room service cuisine. She manages to ignore the phone for a bit, but then gets a visit from Captain Jack. They head to the latest murder (suicide?) scene where Fox tracks Dana down by phone. Clearly he doesn’t handle his days off as well as Scully does. Dana concedes to Bonsaint they should keep themselves open to extreme possibilities. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, Scully is “the Mulder” this time. Melissa, who is back home with Polly and dolly, is being tortured by the "Hokey Pokey" record playing over and over again. She also sees a vision of a dying Riggs. Dana and the captain discuss the case over dinner, during which Scully learns Rich died after a grappling hook went through his skull on a boat. Buddy confronts Melissa about almost running over the ranger. And dolly wants to play again, which doesn’t bode well for Riggs.Dana interviews Rich’s fishing partner, who was on the boat when Polly's dad caught the doll in one of the traps. They heard weird noises afterward and Rich later died horribly. When Mulder calls again, Scully asks him about possessed objects. Fox seems a little too eager to explain the concept of Chucky to her. Polly starts freaking out because her mother isn’t making popcorn quickly enough. Sorry Polly, but it’s hard to concentrate when your friend (in this case, Buddy) is lying dead on the floor and getting blood everywhere.
After her daughter finally goes to sleep, Melissa starts hammering the windows closed again, but the noise wakes Polly and dolly. Melissa then sees a vision of the hammer claw lodged in her own forehead. Dana and Jack arrive at Melissa’s house and Bonsaint spots Riggs' car outside. Melissa tries to burn down the house, and Scully and Bonsaint naturally attempt to stop her. Then Melissa bashes herself in the head several times with the hammer while Dana strives – not aggressively enough, I might add – to wrangle the doll from Polly. Scully finally wins and tosses the doll into the microwave, breaking the hold it had over Polly and Melissa. On Monday morning, Sculder are back in their office engaging in lame post-weekend chatter. And somehow a fisherman pulls the barbecued doll from the ocean. She still wants to play… Sestra Professional:
Well, if the Master of Horror can't deliver a top-notch episode for The X-Files, I guess I shouldn't be too tough on the likes of Larry and Paul Barber ("Gender Bender, Season 1 Episode 14); Marilyn Osborn ("Shapes," S1E19) and Kim Newton ("Revelations," S3E11). There's something so awkward about Stephen King's presentation and even the script massaging by executive producer Chris Carter doesn't do much to alleviate that.
We're on King's turf in New England, but he doesn't seem too at home. It's like one of his film adaptations that doesn't live up to the book, like Children of the Corn. This offering has moments when it's like The Stand -- some good, some meh overall -- but probably it's most like Dreamcatcher, basically feeding off the talent of an actor truly invested in a character. The teaser does seem to sorta have something going for it, even if the death vision inside the frozen-food case seems kinda lame. Some of the extras were definitely better at dealing with doll terrorism than others. That's probably another reason why "Chinga" never seems quite balanced. (By the way, I've never been quite sure about the title of the episode, even before people took offense at every little thing they consider offensive on social media.)
Let's have fun: I can't determine whether Dana's vacation selection is perfect, out of character or just perplexing. Whatever the case, I'll utter one chuckle for Scully's choice of bedside reading material -- Affirmation for Women Who Do Too Much -- and major points for her choice of ride (although the Maine t-shirt is a little over the top, so to speak).I'm also on the fence about the Sculder phone conversations here. Maybe it's a good time in the series for Dana to be asserting herself, to be more than just the sounding board for Fox. However, it feels really awkward how it plays out here. That might just be because we saw something similar done to better humorous effect in "War of the Coprophages" (S3E12). Do the shippers really get off on Mulder saying "Scully, marry me" after she shows some knowledge of buzz words in the black arts? Their connection is so much better than that, so much deeper than that. To detract from it with a line that any ol' wisecracking lead male in a series can say to his counterpart comes off supremely lame to me.
We've had a lot of great creepy kids in the series to this point. Polly (Jenny-Lynn Hutcheson) ain't one of them. I sorta wonder if this episode might have played better with someone who could have coaxed some sympathy out of the viewers. Basically I wanted to put her into the blender instead of ice cream ... and a cashier who wouldn't cough up more cherries. They deemed Polly autistic, although her story didn't seem to really play that way -- a teacher whose response to the girl's behavior would be hitting her? That's against some scholastic oath, I'm sure. They could have gotten more mileage out of the overall story if Polly's history factored into it better. The way it ultimately aired, the doll had more dimension than the child.I never ever want to hear the "Hokey Pokey" again. I don't wanna hear a doll say "I want to play" or "Let's have fun" again. I'll probably be able to accomplish that just by avoiding "Chinga" on future rewatches and not hanging around talking dolls. Sorry, Betsy Wetsy. ... I also could do without another character named Melissa. Can't Scully even flinch at hearing the same name as her deceased sister, who was wrongly killed by someone who thought she was Dana?
Meta manuscript: Sculder show some knowledge of pop culture with a reference to Chucky. Brad Dourif -- the memorable Luther Lee Boggs in "Beyond the Sea" (S1E13) voices that character in the Child's Play films. ... Mulder's penchant for tossing pencils in the ceiling first were displayed in this episode. ... David Duchovny lost to King on Celebrity Jeopardy in 1995. But the writer told Duchovny he loved the show and wanted to pen one. ... Although they're both credited for the script, Carter and King never met in person, according to the official episode guide. 
Guest star of the week: Larry Musser, in his fourth and final appearance on the show finally garners the honor. His previous eps were anchored by other powerhouse characters -- "Die Hand Die Verletzt" (S2E14), "Jose Chung's From Outer Space" (S3E20) and "Requited" (S4E16). In this one, it's either him or the creepiest moppet since the title character in The Twilight Zone's "Living Doll." Musser complements Gillian Anderson nicely, and he has far better manners than Jose Chung's Detective Manners.
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