Saturday, June 15, 2019

X-Fest 2: Best con in any universe


We interrupt our regularly scheduled rewatch blog to recap the action from last week's X-Fest 2 in Schaumburg, Illinois. And there was a lot of it. I wish every pop-culture convention could be as laid-back as this one at the Hyatt Regency.

You didn't have to be staying at the hotel to run into cast and crew from The X-Files. That happened a lot. It was fabulous to walk down the hall and say “Hi, Nick” to Nicholas Lea (Alex Krycek) or “Morning, Frank” to executive producer Frank Spotnitz. It did take some time to get used to that, all the fans initially were all bugging out over the casual nature of seeing Mitch Pileggi (Walter Skinner) with a bunch of Snickers bars, The Lone Gunmen (Bruce Harwood, Dean Haglund and Tom Braidwood together again!) and The Enigma (The Conundrum) at the bar. But no one bum-rushed people asking for autographs and selfies. I think the celebrity guests were given time and space that they wouldn't have gotten at an event not brought to you by This Con Life.


And that's how we all lived for the weekend. You may not have gotten a kiss goodbye on the cheek from Mark Snow, but then again, I didn’t pose for a silly selfie with Chris Owens (The Great Mutato/Spender/Young Cigarette Smoking Man) or get an “I’m hongry” phone call from Karin Konoval (Mrs. Peacock/Judy/Chucky/Madame Zelda). Which is not to say I don’t have Chris and Karin stories from outside the con doors, ‘cause I do.

At one point, you stop counting the times you said "hi" or rode the elevators with the celebs. Well, except for the time Sestra Am and I were trying to go down to the show floor, accidentally got in the elevator going up and "picked up" Larry Musser (Detective Manners/Jack Bonsaint/Denny Markham/Sheriff John Oaks) on the floor above us.

OK, even when sleep deprived, I remember initially seeing Dean Haglund smirk at my "Get in Loser" t-shirt at the elevator. But I recovered when Chris Owens came our way, and he remembered us before the show even opened when we bumped into each other again.

After spending the day at Wrigley Field, we started X-Fest by watching the trivia competition and rooting for the friends I met at the inaugural con and two sets of X-Cast teams. There was something deeply weird about the buzzers on the right side of the dais, but it was a fun way to get underway. Maybe the questions should get tougher as the rounds progress.

We had no idea what to expect from The Enigma's show, but it was a fascinating blend of really gross things and humor. He swallowed a sword and a light saber -- I found it particularly funny that he could do that but didn't want to ingest hair from his costume wig. The Enigma hammered and drilled nails into his nose. He inhaled a condom through his nose and exhaled it through his mouth, and then the reverse. There was a prolonged bit involving draining blue and yellow Gatorade through tubes, inevitably returning it to the bottle as green before drinking that too. E put hooks in his face and blindfolded himself while hanging a running chainsaw from them. He became a human Lite-Brite. At least he has a great motto -- "Safety third. Fame and fortune first."

After that part of the program, we watched his Season 2 episode "Humbug" and he hosted a question-and-answer session. I just had to ask -- quoting from the ep -- "Are you one of those rare individuals whose nerve endings don't feel pain?" E shook his tattooed head "no" and told us about his history. After being raised on private lessons, he discovered sideshows and a willingness to give his life for magic. "Even though it's silly and funny, it's my life and all that," he said. "Sometimes you have to give up your life to be who you are."

The Enigma told us his look all started because he wanted to be blue and about 250 artists from around the world have contributed puzzle-piece tattoos. Darin Morgan based "Humbug" on him and others in his sideshow, giving artistic credibility to them and The X-Files. He recalled meeting director Kim Manners (the five-star hotel wouldn't let him in the bar because of his facial piercing). He further detailed that he didn't actually eat a fish and how cold it was to be filming soaking wet and wearing just a piece of leather. And he came up with the best fan fiction idea I've ever heard -- The Conundrum vs. Flukeman.

We started Day 2 in an intimate breakfast with Frank Spotnitz. After asking the attendees about ourselves, he told us about the episodes that never got written -- more great fan fiction ideas! -- a guy who died tells Scully there is no God, and the one I always waited for, a Krycek episode. I wish I asked him more about what the idea was for that one.

I always ask people who have worked with the late, great Kim Manners -- who directed more episodes of The X-Files than anyone else -- about him. Frank teared up right away. "I loved him, we all did," he said. He described Kim's the best way I've ever heard, that he was an "emotional camera," always looking for the power in the scene. Spotnitz has remembered that ever since and has never seen anyone capture moments to the degree Manners consistently did it.

According to Frank, show creator Chris Carter's original plan was for the show to last five years and Mulder would find his sister, Samantha, at the end. Ultimately, the end of the regular run proved to be a bit of a disappointment. "It wrapped up the plot. It didn't wrap up the emotional journey," he said. "In our defense, it would have been really tough to do that."

Spotnitz was very forthright about how I Want to Believe was never intended to be the end of The X-Files. He was disappointed he couldn't work on the revival since he was helming The Man in the High Castle and expressed great surprise over the ultimate ending of the show. In a finale, he said, you have to give the viewers what they want, but you also have to have a level of surprise. "What [Chris] did was none of those things," he admitted. "I think he went way into the 'surprise the audience' side. He was trying to keep the show new and vital." He stopped short of dumping on it, but added it wasn't the way he would have gone with it.

Frank, who ran the writers' room, said fans ultimately helped make the series what it was. "They remembered everything," he said. "So we pushed ourselves to be as smart as we could. I think that's why a lot of the writers have gone on to have great careers." He credited the friendly directorial rivalry between Manners and Rob Bowman for the visual sophistication of the early years. "Chris set this work ethic in place. Those of us who stayed thrived," he said.

Spotnitz was the one who was able to induce Darren McGavin onto the show. Kolchak had been an inspiration to Carter as The Night Stalker, but initially he considered The X-Files a ripoff of his program. Frank and John Shiban wrote Season 4's "Travelers" as an homage to The Night Stalker, with McGavin's Agent Dales initially discovering the X-files in the '50s.

After recapping the breakfast on the X-Cast podcast, the Sestras set out to start a frenzied day split between the autograph room and the professional photo ops included in the platinum package. For years, I've been working on "The X-Files Yearbook Project," getting as many autographs from people involved in the show in my copy of The Complete X-Files. X-Fest 2 was a veritable supermarket to that end.

We just had to start out with Musser, since he's one of the best characters in my favorite episode of television of all time -- Season 3's "Jose Chung's From Outer Space." Larry was so engaging, I could have spent the rest of the day just talking with him. (And actually, I'll get another chance at asking everything I wanted to because I'm going to be co-hosting an X-Cast podcast with him next week.) We talked about how Detective Manners was based on the director, who actually was going to play the role at one point but ultimately decided against it. He said "Jose Chung" was as much fun as we all expected it to have been to work on. Originally, Detective Manners' "colorful phraseology" was just going to be bleeped out, but they decided to have Musser actually say "bleep" and the like instead. Thank goodness for that, it adds a whole other level of charm to the proceedings.

Then we swiftly moved over to Jeff Gulka (Gibson Praise). Being in the Vancouver regular-season finale in Season 5 was his first professional speaking part and the chess scene in front of thousands, many of whom were fans, was the first one they shot. Then 11 years old, he thought he might be in the movie and on the show for longer since Gibson was said to be "the secret to everything in the X-Files," but only came back for the Season 6 premiere. Well, until he was called upon again for the two-part opener of Season 8. "I didn't even know if I still had an agent," he laughed about his S8 return.

Owens had a smile on his face as the duo he kept running into in the hall and at the elevators approached his table. Although he made quite an impression in Season 4 episodes as The Great Mutato and Young Cigarette Smoking Man, I just wanted to talk to him about my favorite Jeffrey Spender episode, "Triangle." He recalled being outfitted head to toe in German military gear and watching his on-screen dad, William B. Davis, try to get through the long speeches without messing up the 10-minute takes reminiscent of Alfred Hitchcock's Rope, thinking, "My dad is rambling in this cue." Then he told us about one specific outrageous rehearsal moment. "In the ballroom scene, David is thrown to the floor in front of me. He just started undoing my fly," Owens said.

We talked with The Enigma about the previous night's show. I told him that the Gatorade routine made me a little nauseous on the heels of the prep for my recent colonoscopy. Nothing like talking about spewing watery liquid with a guy whose character ate an underdeveloped, murderous conjoined twin. And then the perfect intro to having him sign the yearbook -- "It wouldn't be complete without the missing puzzle piece."

I was eager to tell Brian Huskey that he lived every fan's dream as Reggie Something in Season 11's "The Lost Art of Forehead Sweat," getting inserted into vintage X-Files episodes and calling our leads "Sculls" and "Foxy." "I won the sweepstakes," he said. "Darin blows everything up and tweaks it." Although the yearbook's edition ended after the second movie, Brian came up with the idea of signing on a page from one of the episodes Reggie was cut and pasted into and posed with our business card. I'll call that a ringing Sibling Cinema endorsement.

We figured we could squeeze in a Gunman or two before the photo ops began in earnest and started with Tom Braidwood, who continued to do first assistant director duty through the Vancouver years even though he was part of the cast as Melvin Frohike. Tom had a great Manners story at the ready. Kim was directing a scene with two actors, one in the background. And the latter asked him whether he could be seen in the shot. Manners just shot back, "It doesn't matter anyway, you're just a piece of shit in the background." Braidwood said he "grabbed him and said, 'You can't say that.' But that was just his way of talking, he didn't mean anything by it."

Bruce Harwood, the heart of the Lone Gunmen John Fitzgerald Byers, cracked me up when he looked at his yearbook photo and said, "Take it on the face"? He too had a most excellent Manners story. "He gave me the most useful information I've ever gotten as an actor," Harwood said in a much more serious vein. "He said, 'Kick it in the ass,' which means don't waste my time, but don't forget about what you're doing."

We headed off for photo ops. Owens gave us each an extra squeeze and then we departed with a "See you in the lobby!" When Huskey arrived, I started a "Reg-gie, Reg-gie" chant and he flashed us bull horns. Right before the picture, I joked, "We're your favorites, right?" "Yes," he answered diplomatically. And the Lone Gunmen meet Sibling Cinema picture? I told them it was a dream come true that was 30 years in the making. One of them -- all I can be sure of was that I don't think it was Braidwood -- said they'd make it worth the wait. We immediately decided that would be our new Facebook cover photo.

A great friend of mine from another obsession, General Hospital, came down from Wisconsin to visit with me that day. We gave Georgia our extra pass and she went to a couple panels -- including her mom's favorite, Pileggi -- while we continued running around. The Sestras did see part of Lea's panel, though. Nick said he really wishes he could play Krycek again, because he's a much better actor now than he was when he was on the show. "It kind of gnaws at me a bit," he admitted. "The opportunity to revisit and improve on this character is something I'd like to do."

Lea told the assembled he loved getting his hands dirty and recounted his favorite hanging-off-the-balcony, exploding-car and running-from-horses tales that we've heard before at other cons. "Opening the script was always like Christmas," he said. Then he talked about his daughters: "On Dec. 17, my life changed. ... One baby is a challenge, two babies are like 15 times harder. But they're pretty cute."

Later, we met Sheila Larken (Margaret Scully). She pointed out Gillian Anderson was pregnant and hogging the umbrella in the yearbook photo of Dana with her mom. "Look at those cheeks!" she exclaimed. Larken's story about Manners involved him acting out the scene for her. "Then when I did the scene, he said, 'Cut! Print!' I said, 'I get it, when I acted the way you did, you said, 'Cut! Print!'"

And then back to the photo op room again. We got hugs from Nicholas Lea and congratulated him on the birth of his girls. He happily conveyed that twins "happen to you." Larken told the first person on line for hers that she was uncomfortable about doing studio portraits. When I said we'd make it as painless as possible, she said we should look serious. At least two of us did, anyway, Sestra Am caved at the last second and smiled.

For Musser, we were going to act like he just said, "You bet your blankety-blank bleep I am" from "Jose Chung." Afterward, he correctly deduced when we went right to the line for Annabeth Gish (Monica Reyes) that we were going to have quite a collection of photos from the event. He said he'd understand if we ranked Gish higher than him. I made him laugh with my retort, "no bleeping way."

Annabeth commented on our combination X-Files/Blockbuster "I Want to Believe" shirts, and I said we wanted them to reflect that we've been watching her since the VHS days in great flicks such as Mystic Pizza, Hiding Out, Shag and The Last Supper. She loved that (oh, before I forget, Haglund loved them too) ... and I have proof of Gish's appreciation because there's a video floating around Facebook of that exact moment.

We high-tailed it back to the autograph room, because the Lone Gunmen were only there for one day and I could not miss Dean ... again. Everyone seemed to have played it the way we did, Braidwood and Harwood's queues were empty and everyone was in Haglund's. From my spot on line, I played a variation on charades with Bruce. He pointed to Tom's line and then his own, and then Dean's full line. I shook my head and then smacked it in best I-could-have-had-a-V8 manner. Harwood laughed.

When I made it up to Haglund, I just had to go into the time-tested, battle-scarred story of the X-Files Expo I sort of attended in Florida back in 1998. He threw his head back and laughed as I delivered the sob story of how my hungover friend arrived late and puked in my mom's driveway before we got to the event too late for me to see him. Dean asked whether I was still friends with her. And I said, yep, we are ... and all is certainly forgiven now that I finally met him.

We power-walked back to the photo ops to get E -- who affably reacted to my use of that letter, so I'm assuming it's OK -- a day early. He said all the fans are the real stars. And Gulka soaked in all our attention as we wrapped up the autograph/photo portion of the day ahead of schedule, with nine actors tucked away in the yearbook instead of the planned seven.

Then we met up with Georgia at the Lone Gunmen's screening of Season 5's "Unusual Suspects." It can't be measured with existing technology how much fun it is to watch Braidwood, Haglund and Harwood play off each other. They recalled filming the episode while the show's leads were doing things for the feature film. The trio's antics included "trashing David Duchovny's trailer," watching Jackie Chan movies in the original Cantonese and playing Nintendo 64.

Braidwood told the crowd he would have directed a couple of episodes if the original run had continued to many awwws and they laughed about how this episode's director Manners -- who had quit smoking -- was chewing on a toothpick and yelling the whole time. Harwood enjoyed having the spotlight before they had to go back to working one day a week, usually at the tail end of the week. They laughed about the different ways Manners tried to get all three of them in the frame. "Put your head at a 90-degree angle under Tom's armpit," Haglund laughed. And they all had different favorite X-Files monsters of the week: Braidwood, Tooms ... Harwood, Fluke ... Haglund, Enigma.

Dean told the hilarious story of how hard Fox allegedly tried to contact him for the revival ... when the show could have just gone to deanhaglund.com and emailed him. The paranoia had already spread to the actors when they thought the Gunmen might have been recast for Season 10 with Luke Perry, Jason Priestley ... and Fran Drescher?!? In addition to his entertaining podcast Chillipak Hollywood with Phil Leirness, Haglund plans to complete a graphic novel by Christmas (the inference was this holiday season) and also has been filming stop-motion segments with customized Lone Gunmen Legos given to him by an Australian fan.

And the last event of the day was the screening of "The Lost Art of Forehead Sweat" with Huskey. He recalled originally looking at the script as straight drama and thinking, "Oh, shit, I'm in a lot of this." The Veep veteran, who joked he got the gig because he looks like Darin Morgan, recalled the writer/director told Brian he wanted him to deliver the lines "in a bunch of weird ways." There were 36 costume changes involved in the show, not to mention the pinpoint accuracy needed to insert him into previous episodes. "This is one of my favorite life experiences I ever had," Huskey said, before closing by telling fans that the straitjacket feels like "a hug that never ends, so don't be afraid to go crazy, guys."

Sunday morning started with breakfast with Annabeth Gish, and this was really different than Spotnitz's. (Over the eggs at the buffet, I did run into Nick, who was doing his in the same room.) There was very little X-Files discussion, it was mostly going around the table and Annabeth finding out about people who were big enough fans of hers to be there. She imagined a movie or TV show about the jobs of every single one of us at the table. We were all female, and Gish really enjoyed the aspect of women supporting women. But we did develop a secret handshake that she can always remember as a sign of the 12 people who were in that room.

Our time with her ended before I knew it, but before it did, I brought up my biggest disappointment of the revival -- the destruction of Monica's character. The person who had been the most stand-up person during the regular run had turned into the opposite with absolutely no explanation of why. Annabeth said she pleaded with Chris for something, but ultimately did the best she could. "Great hair, great suits ... but I had no voice," she stated perfectly. I went off to see my X-Cast friends and share everything about the meal except the details of the secret handshake.

After that, I brought the photo of Nick and I taken at the first X-Fest to him to be autographed. He said I looked terrified in it, like I wasn't expecting the hug. Maybe I was just overwhelmed at the time. I recapped for him how the line behind me had been "oohing" and "aahing" over that moment.

From there, we went to see the incredible Mark Snow, who did the scores for the entire series as well as Millennium and much more. "I thought I always did a good job," he said. "At least an 8, sometimes an 11." Sestra Am and I talked about one of the 11s, Season 4's "Paper Hearts," which was one of his favorites as well. And I bemoaned the fact that the swing music from S6's "Triangle" will never be released because the show had never gotten clearance to use the piece in the first place. We also talked about the fun he had doing in "Jose Chung," which included a parody of the theme song, and I expressed my appreciation for Millennium.


Full credit is due to Sestra Am for coming up with the idea for my new favorite celeb photo of all time. Nick and I are hugging on one side of the frame, and she's giving me the stink eye on the other side with a big gap in between us. The part not viewed in the picture is how Nick and I were still posing while Sestra went to check the shot to make sure it was perfect. Then we, of course, had to recreate it by switching places for her favorite, Mitch. I think I look more sad than pissed in that variation, but it was also great fun to do. Much thanks to Lea, Pileggi and Wolf Photo Studios for being great sports for that. We were laughing for hours after that, and I still chuckle looking at them a week later.

I got to finally meet Melinda McGraw (Melissa Scully), who seemed stunned to hear that people didn't much care for Scully's sister at the time, but now think of the character more fondly. Then she remembered the sexual tension that was built into the scripts between Melissa and Dana's work partner. She has a deep-seated fear of slash fan fiction that I actually share. In other news, how can there not be a real picture of her in The Complete X-Files? Maybe someone somewhere never got over their initial Melissa feelings, but Melinda was very open and friendly, a lot like her ill-fated character, down to the dress and a crystal dangling from her neck.

Next up, we met Susan Blommaert, so petrifying as Mrs. Paddock in Season 2's "Die Hand Die Verletzt." Blommaert was basically the opposite of her fear-inducing character. She had only the greatest words for Manners, who made his X-Files debut on that episode. "He was fun and he was smart," Susan said. "He let you play with it. But if he needed something else, he would ask for it. One of the best experiences I've ever had." Musser stayed around the second day to meet the other cast members just like we were doing, and even though he and Blommaert were in the same episode, they had never met. Chalk up another cool moment.

Next we went to Rebecca Toolan (Teena Mulder), who quipped that the funniest thing about Manners was his mullet haircut. Her history with him went back long before the show, when he was casting her for another role. (An IMDb search leads me to believe it was 21 Jump Street's Season 4 opener "Draw the Line.") She remembered, "I was going to be late for an audition because I was working on something else. He said, 'If she can't be there on time, I'm not going to cast her.' Then he cast me anyway."

During our last photo ops, Blommaert and McGraw each gave us extra love because they come from families with sisters as well. It was so special to watch Larken sitting at a table and lovingly watching Toolan work her way through her op before they did one together. And Snow sweetly (really, he said it sweetly) deemed us "a couple of nuts" before we got an extra bonus photo because he blinked in the first one. Hey, that's a time-honored Sibling Cinema tactic.

We finally got to take in the amazing props brought by The X-Files Preservation Collection, my X-Fest photo op buddies Jim Thornton and Kelly Anthony. It's really a dazzling array that dutifully shows off all the time and money they've put into it. At some point, Musser went into the room and had a "reunion" with the doll from Season 5's "Chinga" that was sent out over social media almost immediately. I loved the costume pieces from S10's "Mulder and Scully Meet the Were-Monster." Can't wait to see how their collection grows from here. It's already beyond any fan's wildest imagination.

Besides not reacting to Haglund when I first saw him, my biggest faux pas of the weekend had to be not bringing Anne Simon's book, The Real Science Behind the X-Files, to be signed when we finally tracked her down as the last name on the yearbook want list. Then again if I had, she would see that I haven't actually read it yet by its pristine condition. We bided our time waiting for her by hanging out with a friend ... and The Enigma. He was nothing like I ever would have expected before this weekend, a genuinely nice guy appreciative of the attention everyone rightfully paid him.

With 14 of 14 in the yearbook, we went off to Karin Konoval's screening. We had seen her a few times throughout the day and in one of our last photo ops, so it was a blast to watch her totally nail the roles of Judy and Chucky in Season 11's "Plus One" with like-minded fans. Her hosting of "Home" had been one of the highlights of X-Fest 1. Despite all the hard work evident on the screen, she deemed it "one of the easiest, most fun things I've ever done. There was no real makeup, just pure acting." What else would Konoval like to do? Well, a musical actually. "It could even be a male singing role," she said. I'll buy that, she would kill it.


Karin compared being on the set to participating in a ballet with the cast and crew being perfect at everything they did. David Duchovny (Fox Mulder) almost undid her with the twinkle in his eye. "He's so subtle," she said. During that week, she filled up her phone with extemporaneous videos in character as Chucky. She proclaimed "Rm9sbG93ZXJz" (aka "Followers") to be her other preference from Season 11, with her favorite character being the vacuum cleaner.

In closing out her session with a story of how X-Files fans got her incorrect birthday changed on Wikipedia while Planet of the Apes fans just sent birthday greetings on the wrong day, she proclaimed the show's fans to be the best. "You guys do rock it out ... in terms of curiosity and support."

So X-Fest 2 was in the books, but there were still a couple of final touches to be made. I ran into Snow outside the hotel as he waited for his car. We talked about what a fantastic time we both had. He extended his hand and we shook, then he kissed me on the cheek. I felt the bristles from his beard for hours afterward.

Then I sat outside with Konoval. She was the last person I saw at the first one, so it seemed fitting the same was true here. We talked about the cause that would get her to fangirl the way we do for her and the show -- orangutans!! Then we discussed other pop-culture conventions and how the last thing she wants to do is charge people ridiculous amounts of money just to meet her and/or get a picture taken. Before we parted, I gave her a couple of names of ones I consider better than others, making sure to reiterate they're not all like the one This Con Life gave us.

As you can see from all the words before this, it wasn't even close.

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